by Jennifer-Oksana (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Fandom: Desperate Housewives
Spoilers: 6.17 Chromolume #7
Disclaimer: ABC and Marc Cherry hold the copyright to the characters. I don’t and don’t claim that I do.
Summary: A post-ep chaser. Does Robin deserve better? Katherine thinks so.
So it had happened. And Robin was right, it had meant something. What was hard for Katherine, even harder than understanding why she’d slept with Robin (who was beautiful and sexy even to a straight woman) was why Robin was all over Katherine like she was some sort of irresistible treat. Robin deserved someone a lot better.
Robin was making a mistake.
“I don’t know how to be okay with this,” Katherine said. “I keep thinking that I’ll have to wear Birkenstocks or cut my hair…which is ridiculous.”
“Don’t cut your hair,” Robin said with one of her bright little smiles. Katherine liked the way Robin smiled, like everything could be okay, like none of this was life-changing. “You look great just the way you are.”
Was this another aspect of…this? Or was this just Robin and how she was? Katherine wasn’t used to being accepted for everything she was, including being a crazy person who killed ex-husbands and had a past about five times darker than Robin’s stripper one. Robin hadn’t killed anyone, as far as Katherine knew. Katherine didn’t think Robin could kill anyone. Robin was too sunny for that.
“Really?” Katherine asked, fussing with her hair slightly.
“Really,” Robin said, firmly taking Katherine’s hand out of her hair. “Relax, honey. I’m not going to eat you.”
She actually raised her eyebrow when she said that and Katherine heard the unless you want me to, even though Robin didn’t say it.
“You’re way too nice to me,” Katherine said. “Even when you’re telling me I’m full of crap, you’re being nice to me.”
Robin smiled again, all sunshine and curves and whatever it was that made Katherine get fluttery and stupid when she was near Robin. “I like you,” Robin replied with that disarming honesty that killed Katherine. Nobody on Wisteria Lane did honesty. No wonder all the other women on the street didn’t quite trust Robin. They projected their own foibles onto her, of what they’d do if they were as pretty and wonderful as Robin was. “Why shouldn’t I be nice to you?”
Katherine snorted. “Ask half the street about that,” she said bitterly. “And they’d be right, too.”
“What-EVER,” Robin said throatily, swinging her foot back and forth. “Everyone screws up now and then and you have a good heart. Plus, anyone who sees you and can’t see that you’ve been hurt and that what you need is someone to love you and accept you and not judge you is a jerk.”
To her own horror, Katherine started to cry. Robin looked alarmed, so Katherine tried to blink away the tears and smile, but the damned tears kept coming.
“It’s okay!” Robin said, clasping Katherine’s hand between her own (warm, soft, WONDERFUL, get a grip on yourself, Katherine) hands before reaching up and brushing the tears away. “I didn’t mean to make you cry, silly.”
“Why are you so wonderful?” Katherine asked hoarsely. “I don’t understand how someone like you can just fall in my lap…um, so to speak.”
“Kismet,” Robin said blithely. Katherine almost wanted to smack her for being so happy about it. How could Robin not get that Robin was way too good for Katherine, leaving aside all of the gender and sexuality issues? Katherine didn’t deserve Robin and she was trying to do the right thing. Explaining to Robin that Katherine was (probably) straight and also almost too crazy to function in the real world was the right thing to do. That way Robin would get away before Katherine hurt her. Katherine always hurt people, even though she didn’t mean to. That was her nature.
Katherine’s lip trembled, but she bit it so that she didn’t start crying again. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t know if I believe in that.”
“Fate? Destiny? Good luck?” Robin asked, her smile lighting up the whole room.
“Not for me,” Katherine said with a gallows half-smile. “Maybe for you, but…”
Robin laughed. “Yes, because being a lesbian ex-stripper who moved in with a neighbor of my club’s former owner because I had nowhere else to go is proof of my excellent choices in life,” she said, petting Katherine’s shoulder. “Stop being so sure you’re a hopeless tragedy, Katherine. It’s a waste of time.”
“Is that right?” Katherine asked.
“Yes, that’s right,” Robin said with a little bit of exasperation in her voice. “Maybe we’re both such screw-ups that we’re perfect for each other. Or maybe the universe or God or whoever is giving us a break. You never know, do you?”
That was true, Katherine thought. You never, ever knew anything. Well, except that Mike was always going to end up with Susan. She’d broken her brain on that one so she wasn’t going to forget it.
“That’s fair,” Katherine said. “You know I’m probably never going to be 100% okay, right? That there are going to be bad days. Maybe bad months. And I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone, but I really don’t want to hurt you. You’re the first person in a long time who’s been kind to me without an ulterior motive or out of pity.”
Robin looked touched to hear that. “Goodness, I don’t know the last time someone told me something that.” Katherine almost jumped out of her skin. Robin looked a little teary. Why would Robin look teary? “That really means something, hon.”
“Why?” Katherine asked.
“Remember how I’ve also made some awful choices?” Robin said with a grim little smile. “Most people who are interested in me see this–” and Robin mimed her very impressive curves — “They don’t care about what’s in here. And before you ask, yes, women can be just as bad as men when it comes to that.”
“You are extremely hot,” Katherine said dryly.
“I thought you might have noticed that,” Robin replied.
“I thought you might have noticed me noticing,” Katherine replied, feeling the oddest feeling in her throat. To her surprise, it was a laugh. “Well, people who don’t realize the inside of you is at least as amazing as the outside are idiots.”
It took Katherine about three seconds to realize what she’d just said and she turned four shades of red. Robin burst into laughter, slapping Katherine lightly on the thigh.
“Your face!” she said between giggles. “Oh my God, you look like you’re about to choke.”
“This is not funny!” Katherine replied, starting to laugh herself, which only made Robin laugh harder. It wasn’t funny. Okay, it was funny, but why did it have to be funny at her expense? “I feel like a teenage boy who hasn’t mastered the art of the double entendre.”
“It’s totally endearing,” Robin answered. “But I think everything about you is endearing, so I’m a little biased.”
Katherine hid part of her face with her hand and sighed. “Oh, don’t say that,” she said.
Robin tilted her head. “Why not?” she asked, trailing her finger up Katherine’s arm. “You’re gorgeous. You’re smart. You’re an amazing cook. You’re a great kisser…”
Something about Robin’s mouth being close to hers always made Katherine’s mouth get a little dry. Every time, even when she didn’t want to kiss Robin.
And Katherine wanted to kiss Robin now.